For many families, the holidays are painted as a time of joy, rest, and togetherness. But for some children, especially those living with trauma histories, anxiety, or ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) the holidays can be overwhelming.
At Layers Counseling Specialists, we understand that what’s supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year” can actually be one of the hardest. Between disrupted routines, sensory overload, travel, and social expectations, children’s emotional regulation can quickly unravel.
Here’s how you can support your child (and yourself) in navigating the holiday season with more calm, compassion, and connection.
School provides children with consistency: predictable schedules, meal times, teachers, and social rhythm. When school breaks begin, that routine disappears. For a child whose nervous system is already on high alert, that lack of predictability can increase anxiety and reactivity.
The National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN) explains that maintaining structure helps traumatized children feel safe and grounded, especially during transitions.
Crowded gatherings, loud noises, travel, and new environments can overwhelm a child’s senses. For trauma survivors, certain smells, sounds, or interactions may unconsciously remind them of past stress or fear - even if no one else can see why they’re upset.
Children often pick up on the emotional expectations around them. They may feel confused or guilty if they can’t match the holiday excitement of others. This internal pressure can lead to shutdowns, irritability, or withdrawal.
For some children, trauma also impacts how they experience food. ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) isn’t about body image, it’s about anxiety, sensory sensitivities, or negative associations with eating.
The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) notes that ARFID can be triggered by textures, smells, or past experiences that made eating feel unsafe. Holiday meals with new foods or large gatherings can intensify those fears.
How to support your child with ARFID or trauma around food:
If food struggles worsen during the holidays, a trauma-informed therapist can help unpack underlying fears and build positive associations with nourishment.
Children thrive on routine, even during breaks. Create a loose daily rhythm: wake-up times, meals, quiet moments, bedtime - to help the brain feel safe. Visual schedules or checklists can be especially grounding.
Talk about upcoming plans a few days ahead. Describe what will happen, who will be there, and how long activities might last. This helps reduce uncertainty and gives your child time to mentally and emotionally prepare.
If visiting family or traveling, bring familiar comfort items; a favorite toy, blanket, or even a scent to provide sensory reassurance.
It’s okay if you skip events, say no to extra plans, or take breaks when your child’s system is overwhelmed. Regulation is more important than performance.
You can model calm by using grounding techniques yourself: deep breathing, short breaks, or stepping outside for fresh air. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) reminds parents that managing their own stress improves their child’s ability to self-regulate.
Designate a “quiet zone” a spare room, a cozy corner, or even the car where your child can decompress when things feel too intense. Give them permission to use it freely without guilt.
This helps prevent meltdowns and supports self-awareness about triggers.
Instead of forcing participation, find small, meaningful ways to connect. Maybe that’s baking together, walking the dog, decorating cookies, or simply sitting near each other in silence. Safety grows through relationship, not rules.
At Layers Counseling Specialists, our trauma-informed therapists help families navigate the emotional ups and downs of seasonal transitions with compassion and practical tools.
We provide:
Every plan is personalized because no two families experience the holidays the same way.
If your child’s anxiety or trauma reactions significantly worsen during school breaks or if eating, sleeping, or relationships become difficult - professional support can make a big difference.
Therapy can help your child learn coping skills, rebuild emotional safety, and give you as a parent the tools to stay grounded through it all.
If the holidays feel more stressful than peaceful this year, you’re not failing as a parent - you’re recognizing what your child truly needs: safety, structure, and empathy.
At Layers Counseling Specialists, we help families in Plano,Texas move through difficult seasons with more understanding and less overwhelm. Together, we’ll help your child feel secure, supported, and seen.
➡️ Learn more about our Child Therapy Services in Texas or schedule a free consultation today to start building calmer, more connected holidays for your family.
